Hopeless

All I could say is I'm sorry. Not because I was wrong, but, because I can't forgive you. It was just too painful. I was so hurt. I still couldn't believe that you can actually say those things. I was really hurt.

I wanted to forget everything, forgive everything because I thought that if God can forgive us for all our sins, I can too. But, how can I, if just a flash of that memory, a wave of pain comes to my heart? How can I forgive you for all the hurtful words you threw at me? Tell me.

There's a small place in my mind that wishes all of it never happened, that you never said those things, and that you never insulted me. 

I remember all our talks, how you taught me some things that I should learn, and how I treated you like my best friend with whom I can tell my secrets and my heartaches. But, all of it vanished with just a quick flashback. It was done.

Then reality showed me every truth. You did said all those painful words. You did insulted me. You did abandoned me. You did all of it. You hurt me.

So, I'm saying sorry because I don't know if I could ever forgive you. I HATE YOU!